Match Report

I'll fight
Jensen
Shorty
Tim
Allan
Dan Vart
Bruce B
Thomas G
PA
Yannick
Chris C
Frank
Clarkie
Joseph Chang
Fabien
Jon K
Grant
Guy E
(17)

Head Coach: Waz
Skils Coach: Jeroen

It's been a foggy old weekend, so foggy in fact I could barely see the pitch on Saturday, so for a change I've embellished a bit and filled in with a few stories on the side. It's the new reporting style that people have requested, less of the waffle and more of the hard hitting match reportage and highlights. I was also going to take it easy on the French, only time will tell if I took any notice. But first an amazing fact, St. Bridget of Kildare could turn her bath water into beer. This is the sort of patron saint we need in the Club, why has no-one mentioned her before or brought the nun along for a few beers? Does anyone have a picture of a nun in the bath apart from Thomas Toit and the French? Thomas G. has recently admitted he has an imaginary friend, a 3 metre high pigeon called Serge, ask him about it. It gets in the way all the time. Long time fan of Max Mosley, Mr Toit pants was getting his twisted tongue the round way wrong and threatening to come in your face on Saturday. "When I am coming you are going down". I've no idea what goes through his mind or if it was an offer or mistake. Waz has turned himself into a living voodoo doll and now threatens country legend Kenny Rogers with his powers. Already Kenny has lost his beard, his hair has started falling out, he has begun falling over drunk and wearing thongs. He also turned into a tone deaf noise polluter or maybe it was Waz I saw.

Today is apparently presidents day, so it's an ideal opportunity to mention a few home truths and facts. The revolting colonials were getting their ass kicked by the British, there was widespread panic and food shortages. Good to know that in the low point Mr Ben Franklin got himself in a rowing boat and made a brave withdrawal across the Hudson. Standing annoyingly in the bows of the boat making it wobbly when someone was trying to paint him making a strategic escape. Anyway the French kept the British navy at bay for a change, because earl Sandwich had other pressing matters to attend to. The art of putting some meat or cheese between two pieces of bread mainly. Over in Boston some badly dressed Indians, blokes in Ghandi nappies, turbans and sarees were causing the biggest tea pollution incident in history. "Ranjit, threaten them with the lime pickle, curry punching and popadum frisby." The environmental damage was devastating. Otters covered in earl grey, the pungent smell of bergamot in the air, shags and cormorants swimming through slicks of lapsong souchong. One thing led to another and America became independent. Possibly a correct choice at the time, sandwich or America? This had the dramatic effect of ending years of getting rid of god botherers and criminals to America. England launched it's social experiment to the southern hemisphere. They now had to use the capacious open prison called Australia. The French were thankful for this indirect victory and had Louise reduced in height by that fabulous new invention, the guillotine. Independence day is now marked with uncomplementary remarks being made about cheese, monkeys, surrendering and the French. However it does mean that the Americans should be thankful for the French intervention, how do you feel about that? Discovered by a Welshman and now saved by Le Blue. Would you rather have a pigeon called Serge fly into your face unexpectedly instead?

Right, we played DeA over at Tai Hang Tung. The Tatty grass pitch with wet and dry patches. We went on the pitch with hidden confidence, but conceded early on and there was a steady drip of tries and conversions. On the positive side there were some good stops and tackles. Some of which were made on the back foot and in the nick of time to save more points. We had some good runs of play, but didn't manage to get any real sniff of the line. There was A's all round for effort but we were not so good for all round ability. DeA were difficult to stop when they started running. By Half time we had let in 21 unanswered points. We came back in the second half, we probably had our best run of play for a patch, but it didn't show in points against. We were leaking and giving away penalties. The second half saw another 4 tries making 26 points against with the kicks. It must have been the bad visibility or something, anyway we came second.

Final score
DeA 47 - Typhoons 0

Even with Swiss spunk, we were unable to put on a show and get some points. Man of the match was Alan for getting about and tackling hard all day. Smally was busy at full back and kicking in reply, sometimes 20 feet or so. Dan was rubbish as well. The kiosk at the ground had the best days business in months and sorrows were drowned. England lost as well. France put in a mediocre performance. Next week we have Kowloon. We are looking light already with work and holiday commitments. Let Jensen know if you are available. We have 2 more games left and you can retire for months, we all except tour and our visitors games.

C